I am compelled to write today because it is my “Birth Day.” No it’s not my birthday. It is my first born child’s birthday, but 16 years ago today, he entered the world and made me a mother and my world… my heart …they changed forever.
I never want to take anything away from any of my four children. They are all truly deeply loved- each one of them as much as the first and their birthdays are memorable. I often write about the heart’s amazing ability to grow.
Your heart may actually be the only thing your kids don’t have to share. Sure, they share your time, your energy, your money, but not your heart.
Having said that, there is something that comes with the first baby that can only belong to the first.
They were the life changer.
And whether it be a first kiss, a first car or a first kid- you always hold a candle for the first. And with the first, came all those other firsts. The first time to hold your own, to dress, to feed, to bath. You are totally responsible and totally in love. Scared, excited, overwhelmed, exhausted and elated.
Each year on his birthday I get a little melancholy and introspective. I reflect on my years as a mother.
Gosh darn after sixteen years, you’d think I would have this thing down! But each year reminds me I have much more to learn. Their wants, needs and desires are still moving targets, and my mothering skills are being stretched and challenged every day.
The years have flown and sometimes what I wouldn’t give to hold my little boy and hear his little voice just ONE more time. (I KNOW there is money in bottling little boys.)
I have a birthday tradition I started years ago. I hang a sign and balloon on each child’s door the night before their birthday. They awake birthday morning to a “Happy Birthday” and occasionally a crepe paper filled room.
This year it is going on 11 pm on a school night and I can’t wait up any longer for that little boy to go to bed. I can’t wade through the dirty clothes, school books, lacrosse gear and such to hang the crepe paper, so I am going to tape his sign and balloon and call it a night.
Tomorrow I will wake up and remember that amazing day 16 years ago and give him a big hug. He may be 16, but he’ll always be my baby.
Happy Birthday Corey-
Check out our site, where you will find our Children Series prints for the First Born Child, Second, Third and Youngest. You will also find the First Grandchild and Great-Grandchild too.
What are your thoughts on your firstborn child or grandchild? How do you feel on their birthday?